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Thursday 1 April 2021

Lock-down coping mechanisms - self care / comfort is key

Life can be made better by spending money.... well no surprise there, but sometimes it can be made much better by spending little money, other times you need to invest in important items that make a real difference. I am a bargain hunter but I also know when to admit defeat and accept that occasionally, you can only get quality stuff by paying the big bucks! So let's talk about what I've been doing to make my home life more comfortable and my self care more sustainable! 

There comes a time in life when you have to admit that some things are really worth spending money on. BIG money! That happened for me in my early 30s. Back when I was a young and carefree lass I could sleep in really crap beds. Having always lived in rented accommodation, I spent a big chunk of my life sleeping in cheap beds that probably lots of other people had slept in before (and after!) me! On the occasions when I had to buy my own bed, I would get whatever was cheapest at Argos. Then I got older, my back got weaker, my body got bigger(!) and I had to accept that I needed a bed that worked for my body. So a £1000 bed was purchased.... and that was on special offer! In case it's of interest it was a king size Silent Night half ottoman, half drawers divan base, with a mirapocket mattress. The mattress is a thing of wonder... pocket sprung with a layer of memory foam and traditionally tufted on top. it's so deep I had to get special extra deep fitted sheets from Marks and Spencers 'cause normal sheets wouldn't fit it! Anyway, it improved my sleep, my back and my storage. I've had it for around 7 years now and if you looked at it, you'd think it was new. Best investment ever. 

YOU SAID THIS IS ABOUT LOCKDOWN TIMES I HEAR YOU CRY! Fair point, but this is related. Although I have an expensive bed, and I always like to have 100% cotton duvet sets (I can't recommend these George ones enough!), I didn't ever consider spending much on my pillows. I used to buy sets of two for like £8! Then a few years ago I spent a couple of night's at a friends place and slept on some memory foam pillows. I had tried memory foam pillows before but they had always been too hard and too high. These were different. It's not that I thought they were amazingly comfortable, I just slept like a log! Sadly they were also Italian and I couldn't buy them in the UK, so I investigated. 


I couldn't afford the really pricey ones at the time so I ended up with these. Cheap and cheerful. If you are on a tight budget then I really do recommend these. I slept well on them for a few years, but during lockdown I realised I was getting a bit of a sore lower back and neck and realised it was time to replace them.

So it went down like this; "every website says the best pillows are tempur but they're almost £100 each, which is mad for pillows! I'm gonna try some non-memory foam ones from Amazon"

I went for these sweetnight pillows. They looked big and squishy and like fancy hotel pillows. And they are big and squishy and like fancy hotel pillows! Here is the problem though. I'm used to memory foam, which is firmer. These feel so luxurious but I realised quite quickly that I still wanted to find my perfect memory foam! For those of you who hate memory foam (many people do and fair enough, the good stuff is expensive and the cheaper stuff is normally crap!) Then these are great. They're like massive clouds that you sink into! They're also adjustable, in that you can unzip them and take out stuffing (or add stuffing I guess, if you buy some additional filling!) To get the perfect height. These are pillows for the sofa bed now and are perfect height for a firm mattress!

This spurred me on to search for SOFT memory foam pillows. There really aren't many options and the reviews were pretty clear. Tempur cloud pillows. Super soft versions of a pillow brand that already has incredible reviews. I gritted my teeth and found the best price available on the internet and ordered two. 





£160s worth of pillows arrived pretty quickly and whoa! These things are HEAVY! They weigh a damn ton, but they felt heavenly! They also felt high. I was worried after the first night that they were in fact too high and I'd have to send them back, but aha! You can unzip the baulky cover they come in and it actually makes a marked difference. They're an odd nude colour which showed though my bedding so I put a white pillowcase on to neutralise the colour (and protect the pillows to be honest, because £80 each!), then my normal silver grey cases. I sleep like a drunk! My lower back is very grateful for the expenditure and so it my brain for nodding off almost as soon as my head hits this sublime pillow!


Sometimes self care means stress relief and I honestly don't know of a better way than through orgasm! I consider it an excellent way to calm myself down, help with anxiety, help with period pains (it apparently speeds up periods too as the muscle spasms help release more blood from the cervix!)and headaches etc. It's good for us and we should do it al lot! I'm extremely lucky to have a partner who is an expert at providing me with the big O on the reg, but I'm not gonna bother him every time I fancy a quick one, or if it's just to release tension rather than enjoyment. Masturbation is an essential part of life and if you are someone who likes clitoral stimulation (like what I is) then I have done some upgrades during lockdown. Of the ones I've bought, some are great and I highly recommend them. I don't mess around with battery powered toys because it's wasteful and frustrating if they die (or start dying slowly making the toy weak!). Rechargeable toys can be pricey but I've found some brilliant and affordable ones....


The Satisfyer pro 2 was recommended to me by a friend who needed a toy that was gentle and could be used without directly touching the clitoris. I wanted to suggest it for that reason! When I was younger I was too sensitive for vibrators. I would have loved this back then! Nowadays I can cope with pretty intense vibrations so using this is a longer and more drawn out orgasm, but it's intense when it arrives! The price has come down a fair bit so it's much more affordable than it was when it first came out! 

I like portable toys. Stuff that doesn't take up too much space, but packs a punch! This tiny little Bondara toy is wonderful! It's actually amazing how strong the vibrations are! It's not super quiet but it's quiet compared to a lot of wand style toys. 3 heads, all good. Probably my current favourite!

Last but not least is this genius little Lovehoney kit. Simple but powerful bullet vibe with different silicone attachments. I wouldn't use the bullet on its own because it would make my teach chatter! The heads are fab though and make the vibration less crazy. A real bargain this one!

Speaking of my lady parts, I changed over to organic tampons ages ago. I swap between menstrual cups* and tampons.  When I first saw organic tampons I was like..... how are they not all organic? What the fucking hell have I been putting inside my most delicate area if tampons aren't just automatically orgainic?! HORROR! Needless to say that when I found out that regular tampons contain ALL SORTS of chemicals I started to realise why my fanny wasn't too keen on them! I was using Lil-lets organic (which are excellent) but during lockdown I changed to a subscription because I was actually at my flat and could take delivery. Callaly are great and I highly recommend them. 

* I don't think I've talked about menstrual cups on the blog have I?! I tried a few brands and really struggled to find the right fit, but now I have lots! Me Luna are my brand. They are great for regular ladies but also those with a low sitting cervix, (mine gets lower when I'm on!) as they have shorty cups. Shorty is also a good option if you don't want there to be any chance of them being visible.... even if you're naked and bent over! They also have the options of loops that you can hook your finger into, making them so much easier to get out than the balls or tails on other cups! less panic if you find it hard to reach. They come in firmness levels soft, classic and sport. I only ever use my soft at the very start or very end of my period as the softer the cup, the harder it is to pop it open when inside. I like classic for regular days but generally sport is my favourite. They pop open easily and lock into place fast. on my heaviest day I use my normal length one because it has a larger capacity, but most of the time I use a shorty XL and it's bloody great! Cheaper than some of the more famous brands too. I know some people just have one cup but I like the option of wearing the best and most comfortable one for each different day!

I don't have good water pressure in the flat I live in. It's not dreadful but it's not good. I also live in a "very hard" water area in London, so obviously the limescale in crazy! I can't do much about it but when my folks bought a new shower the recently I thought it might be time to replace my ravaged showerhead too. I investigated on Amazon and thought I'd try one of the ionic heads

Oh my gawd why didn't I do this sooner?! It's like showering in a misty waterfall! Obviously I'm hoping the claims about the mineral balls are true and will help soften my water, which will be good for my akin and hair, but in terms of pressure, the tiny holes and the force created by the water flow having to push through the beads is wonderful! The little button on the side has three settings. One that is like a regular showerhead and is my favourite for washing my body, one that is really condensed in the middle for a massage effect that I love for hair washing and a combination of the two which is my partner favourite.... it's the most misty!

I read some reviews that said this isn't good for electric showers but it seems to be working a treat for me! We have a shower that sometimes doesn't ignite the boiler on cooler settings at shower rush hours in our flat (is downstairs are using the water!) But I find that I need to use a slightly hotter setting with this because of the misty nature, so I suspect it's going to work better on cooler settings (in hot weater) than the old one. Oooh a cold, misty shower if we get another heatwave this year? YES PLEASE! Also.... the hose included is better quality (and longer) than the last two showers I've had. Very impressive for such a low price!

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